Catheter Woes – A comical digest by An MS Patient

Stuart SchlossmanAn MS Patients Story

The following message was written by a Friend of mine with a progressive form of MS. “R” , as he wishes to be known wrote this message, which may seem comical to some  – but surely not to him while he was going thru the “situation”.. Yes, there are some words written, that some may not have comfort in reading, but if I removed them, it would take away from  what “R” felt, and what he went through …


Wanting to remain anonymous, this is  “R’s” story, from what he recalls of last night’s adventure…And know that this is rated PG for strong language:::::

  • 12 midnight.
  • Toilet.
  • Nothing.
  • Why is this tube hanging down?
  • Open.
  • Shit. Must’ve come loose.
  • Wasn’t pushed in  enough.
  • Wait a second. The tube is out of my belly.
  • Oh fuck.  That shouldn’t be.
  • Maybe I’m not seeing correctly.
  • Uh oh, I am seeing correctly.
  • Don’t pass out.
  • Not yet, at least.
  • Hit the button. A long lapse.
  • Do you need help?
  • Yes,. Hurry.
  • Eternity.
  • Riding in the big mobile one.
  • The mini-hospital on wheels.
  • At least I got outta the house.
  • Humid as hell.
  • Kinda cool inside this box .  Lights flashing.
  • Mood lighting.
  • Too bad I can’t enjoy this priceyride.
  • Am I dying? Am I dead, yet?
  • Don’t think so.
  • BP 170 over 100. I’m usually on the low side.
  • I must be dead.
  • Are they going to have to cut me open?
  • There’s a balloon in there. How are they going to get it out?
  • Hope a good surgeon is on call.
  • I’m dead. I’m going to die tonight.
  • At least I have my cell with me.
  • Not that I would be calling from the other side.
  • Just in case somebody calls wondering why I don’t answer the land line.
  • Don’t want them to worry.
  • No balloon inside. The tube is out.
  • Have to put a new one in.
  • Are you sure? Did you check?
  • Asked same question a few times.
  • Same answer.
  • No surgery. It’s out.
  • The doctor will put in a new one.
  • Expensive night.
  • I live for another day. Thank GD.
  • Next episode to make me crazy. Crazier. The mind is a motherfucker.










.===========================================================
Disclaimer:  ‘MS Views and News’ (MSVN), does not endorse any products or services found on this blog. It is up to you to seek advice from your healthcare provider. The intent of this blog is to provide information on various medical conditions, medications, treatments, and procedures for your personal knowledge and to keep you informed of current health-related issues. It is not intended to be complete or exhaustive, nor is it a substitute for the advice of your physician. Should you or your family members have any specific medical problem, seek medical care promptly.
Visit our MS Learning Channel on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/msviewsandnews