January 21, 2014
How are your relationships impacted by MS?
MS has been referred to as a “family disease”, not only
impacting the person diagnosed but impacting all within the family and of
course the significant other/partner. Since MS often sets such an unpredictable
road map to a couple and family they will have to learn to navigate this
sometimes erratic map together, being adaptable and resourceful. Ideally, all including
the patient and significant other will be open to embracing and learning the
best approaches and moving forward as a united front. This is easily said, but
is often not a natural process and requires some work.
impacting the person diagnosed but impacting all within the family and of
course the significant other/partner. Since MS often sets such an unpredictable
road map to a couple and family they will have to learn to navigate this
sometimes erratic map together, being adaptable and resourceful. Ideally, all including
the patient and significant other will be open to embracing and learning the
best approaches and moving forward as a united front. This is easily said, but
is often not a natural process and requires some work.
Relationships that tend to flourish and grow post MS
diagnosis are those relationships that are open to change, communication and
flexibility. This is often not a natural process, but one that requires taking
proactive measures and awareness to ensure that the stress of the MS diagnosis
does not have a debilitating impact on the family relationships. Periodic marriage/ couples and family
counseling have proven to be beneficial to assist in addressing many topics
such as issues around anger, dependency and fears of abandonment which are all
very common. It is also important to keep an open line of communication around
new demands on caretakers, new and changing roles and boundaries within the
family structure. As it has been so eloquently stated,
diagnosis are those relationships that are open to change, communication and
flexibility. This is often not a natural process, but one that requires taking
proactive measures and awareness to ensure that the stress of the MS diagnosis
does not have a debilitating impact on the family relationships. Periodic marriage/ couples and family
counseling have proven to be beneficial to assist in addressing many topics
such as issues around anger, dependency and fears of abandonment which are all
very common. It is also important to keep an open line of communication around
new demands on caretakers, new and changing roles and boundaries within the
family structure. As it has been so eloquently stated,
“Couples who manage
MS successfully have one thing in common. They are flexible and each of them
get support and attention. They have found a place for MS in their relationship
so that MS gets enough attention to keep quiet, but not so much attention that
there isn’t time for anything else”. K Techner & L.Hartman
MS successfully have one thing in common. They are flexible and each of them
get support and attention. They have found a place for MS in their relationship
so that MS gets enough attention to keep quiet, but not so much attention that
there isn’t time for anything else”. K Techner & L.Hartman
Like in everything, finding a balance is key. Remember to draw on your personal interests
and focus on living well and keeping a sense of humor. Communication, laughter,
physical affection and romantic gestures will strengthen your relationship. Remember to make a conscious effort to share
thoughts, feelings, anxieties and failures, hopes, aspirations, and what made
you feel good that day. Couples need to keep focused on these important things
to ensure each other’s wellness and happiness as a couple and a family.
and focus on living well and keeping a sense of humor. Communication, laughter,
physical affection and romantic gestures will strengthen your relationship. Remember to make a conscious effort to share
thoughts, feelings, anxieties and failures, hopes, aspirations, and what made
you feel good that day. Couples need to keep focused on these important things
to ensure each other’s wellness and happiness as a couple and a family.
By Jennifer Falk, MSW; CPHM
Jennifer Falk is the Social Work Programs Coordinator for
Neuroscience Centers of Florida Foundation ;
you can reach her
directly @ 305-456-3797 ext. 104
directly @ 305-456-3797 ext. 104
Jfalk.nscff@gmail.com
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